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Old 05-30-2017, 05:55 PM   #46
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Digital perspective is easy. Traditional perspective is a PITA because the vanishing points are usually feet off the page. Usually at least one anyway. Other than that it's mostly easy. It'd make my head spin if I had to draw a spiral staircase reflected in the water as seen in a mirror, but that doesn't come up every day.

So far it doesn't look like anyone cares for or notices the texture, so I'll drop it.

You can read all of REINCARRION @ xtin.net.

Dialogue hasn't played a big part in this story yet. I've tried writing character driven stories in the past, and that's o.k. too, but this is a big idea story. The characters will talk with each other when the time is right.
It seemed to me you were saying the opposite in a prev post.

If your vanishing points are feet off the page for almost any reason, that sounds like a structure issue. I think it's appropriate to re-work your shot in that case to be simpler, clearer; in that regard 1 point perspective is almost always best. John Romita JR is a great wielder of 1 point, John Buscema and Kirby as well.

A 3D modeler like Sketchup or sketchfab.com would also help in that rare spiral staircase reflection moment.

I must tell you the dialogue thing is confusing because A) I didn't say anything about dialogue specifically and B) every page you've posted here has been rich with copy, both speech balloons and captions. If dialogue doesn't play a big part in this story that's gone on for now two volumes, why does it have dialogue at all? Could it be wordless and say the same things? Probably not. Names and places and motives would be lost if you stripped away copy. Are those un-important?
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Old 06-09-2017, 01:19 AM   #47
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The Kickstarter video is finally finished. I'm going to look into what else is involved in setting up the Kickstarter and hopefully I'll get it launched soon. This is the first time I've tried Kickstarter so I'm going to pursue a strategy of not asking for much as an initial goal, but having stretch goals available if the interest materializes. The main problems I see are the small size of my existing following, and the rewards structure. I believe the video I've made sells the project well, if you're into the scifi/fantasy/horror genre. As for the reward structure, I'm sure people will want a print book but my goal is to pay for the time to make the rest of REINCARRION. Naturally I'm adverse to offering rewards that eat up all or most or a substantial amount of the funding. What I can do is offer .pdfs of the first GN and the first issue of REINCARRION, and some other related material like the Extinction Level Event comic (a totally different book but it is related). I can also draw people in the comic, put a credit in, that kind of thing. The gist of it is that I'm adverse to creating physical objects until the time to make the rest of the book is paid for. After that it is not such an issue for prints or shirts, but I think the book itself will have to much sex and nudity and gore for a print run. I've read horror stories about printing adult-ish material and I'd rather do digital and put my time into making more XTIN.


MattTriano - I do perspective with the path tool trick all the time.

It's true I could drop down to one point perspective. Even better, I wonder if there's a usb projector out there? Then I could do perspective in GIMP and project it onto the printed page. Something to think about if my pages become valuable.

I've used Blender on overly complicated perspective jobs.

About dialogue you said "Use any extra time to play with dialogue, it's the thing I think you need to work on most."

The first book was mostly villains talking at each other. So far this book has been an action sequence and the guru's inner monologue. It may have some dialogue but it's not going to become a Tarantino movie. Eventually I'll get into it but the story has to want to go there.
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Old 06-09-2017, 05:07 PM   #48
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I wonder if there's a usb projector out there? Then I could do perspective in GIMP and project it onto the printed page. Something to think about if my pages become valuable.

The first book was mostly villains talking at each other. So far this book has been an action sequence and the guru's inner monologue. It may have some dialogue but it's not going to become a Tarantino movie. Eventually I'll get into it but the story has to want to go there.
I don't know about a usb projector (which would be fun for painters) but you could print penciled or partially-inked pages in blue line and ink traditionally (I color my pages this way using watercolor BTW).

'Mostly villains talking AT each other' sounds hard to read. Is the newest page you've posted from the new book or the first book? Because it's CHOCK FULL of copy -- dialogue in specific -- and it's tough to read, tough to track what people are talking about from page to page.

I mentioned dialogue as an example of copy. Post a scene, I asked. A page like this (above) and a couple more that go together in a row. I asked you to do that so I could get an idea of how you tell a story over pages that are meant to connect, since the pages you post are often single pages that seem from different parts of your story. But you told me that this book doesn't HAVE a lot of copy yet every page you post has copy.

Minus continuity 'I was made to be the least possible dragon that could still be useful' is still a riddle of a sentence. What does it mean?

Sounds like I might have misinterpreted your posts as a request for critique, my apology if that's the case. Are you posting to advertise the books you're doing or to get feedback on the pages?

FYI in pnl 5 of this page you've covered the device your character is holding with his speech balloon, best to move it up into the negative space in rt corner. Cropping hands and objects of attention is always a poor idea.
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Old 06-11-2017, 08:59 AM   #49
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Promo video 2 is here - https://youtu.be/ue9szwRxjgE

What do you think? I'd like to make more videos if I can fund the time. This went together quicker than I thought it would. I tried not to spend too much time on it, but it still looks o.k. When scenes are dark and blurry, you can get away with a lot. Character animation can be tough but in the first book most of the characters don't wear much, have masks, are bald, or deformed. I can go far without getting into cloth sim,facial animation, or hair. That stuff gets complicated. So, short films that don't get overly ambitious are doable.
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Old 06-11-2017, 04:07 PM   #50
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Watched the video as well as the old 1998 render on Youtube, you're a great designer. Inventive shapes. Looks like you know how they work, strong point of view.

I have to tell you: the pull quotes about the book in the video are an odd touch, especially since some of them aren't overly positive; one if not two of the quotes say something like 'I don't get it but the art is pretty' which, I dunno, as writer I wouldn't take that as a compliment. On same subject, you quote a single source twice(!) which has the words 'fan blog' in the title and that looks kinda lame, serves to de-legitimize the product you're trying to sell. Does that make sense?

Oh - how do you pronounce the title? 'EX-TIN' or 'ZY-TIN' or other?
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Old 06-11-2017, 08:32 PM   #51
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Not many people have written about XTIN. As far as quotes go, I'm thrilled to have any. I could pull out the parts about the story being confusing, but it seems dishonest.

I think X-T-I-N in my head, just the letters pronounced individually, but I find the way the British guy in the first promo video pronounces it amusing (end of the video) -



It's not a great name but the URL is short.
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Old 06-20-2017, 12:37 AM   #52
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Also, reworked first promo trailer -

About the page, I'm not sure the guru's logic holds up. He may be stressing out a little.

I've been busy on Patreon (patreon.com/xtin) lately, uploading lots of stuff. There were not many rewards in the past, but that is changing. I've got a large volume of older work to upload and it will take some time to do it. I'm starting to appreciate the strength of Patreon for keeping touch with fans on a more frequent basis, and serving as a catch-all for art that doesn't fit on the comic sites, or isn't finished enough for an art site. I'd like to see more activity over there. I've got several free posts and will be doing more in the future, so why not check it out?

Finally, remember a year ago when I lost my job because a guy I was working with got busted for being a child molestor? The charges were dropped. It appears he was innocent after all. As far as I can tell the whole thing was made up by one of his kid's school teachers wanting to get at him. He still ended up in jail though due to financial problems caused by not being able to work due to being in jail on false child molestation charges. Total injustice for him and his family, and all those around him who lost their jobs, or the owner who had his business nearly ruined. In this case I hope that person can get a return on all the harm that radiated out from their vindictive behavior. They'll probably skate away with no consequences though.
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Old 06-21-2017, 01:09 AM   #53
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How did you lose YOUR job if a guy you worked with was (now we know falsely) accused of something horrible? Where do you fit in? Sorry you lost your job BTW
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Old 06-21-2017, 02:29 PM   #54
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How did you lose YOUR job if a guy you worked with was (now we know falsely) accused of something horrible? Where do you fit in? Sorry you lost your job BTW
He was a carpenter, I was his assistant. When he got canned, the company owner didn't have any other work for me. The company took a big hit when the local media announced the carpenter was a child molester. All the homeowners the company owner had been doing work for freaked out because he'd had this "child molester" in their homes. I was told Lowe's stopped paying him for the work he was doing through them, which was most of his business. My neighbor worked without pay for several months before quitting. I've been hearing about the aftermath through the neighbor, so this is third or fourth hand information, but what I was told is that the evidence against the carpenter was so flimsy that the Judge laughed at it and threw it out it like it was nothing. The carpenter was in jail as an accused child molester for nearly a year on phoney charges it only took a judge a few moments to dismiss. Think about that. Nearly a year of his life stolen by some teacher or social worker who took a disliking to him.
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Old 06-22-2017, 08:04 PM   #55
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I took a look at your project and it is very visually stimulating. You're a very inspired artist, and it's easy to see you generally have a big imagination. The concept of this series is interesting, however, I find that the delivery of... well... pretty much everything will make this series near inaccessible for most readers. Even when the imagery is impressive, it can be difficult at times to tell what is happening, and even though the dialogue is cool, it can be hard to puzzle out what it means, or what it means in the context of everything else.

So... more or less, it's really hard to tell what is going on here, especially when you throw in your own names and terms that are really long and difficult to pronounce (and thus they can be hard to remember easily).

Granted, the esoteric element of all of this has its own appeal, but at the end of the day, I think most readers are looking for something a lot less challenging. That doesn't mean they're looking for something stupid, that just means they're looking for something they can understand and relate with on some level.

Also, a word of advise, if you're really serious about this project, and you must be to have done 230 or more pages for it, I recommend getting your own website for it.

All in all, great art, and this is really, really interesting, if near impossible to digest. I guess, I should say a reader probably could digest this if they REALLY, REALLY, REALLY tried, but I think it's asking too much of most readers. I think they may give up and move on.
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Old 06-22-2017, 11:12 PM   #56
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I took a look at your project and it is very visually stimulating. You're a very inspired artist, and it's easy to see you generally have a big imagination. The concept of this series is interesting, however, I find that the delivery of... well... pretty much everything will make this series near inaccessible for most readers. Even when the imagery is impressive, it can be difficult at times to tell what is happening, and even though the dialogue is cool, it can be hard to puzzle out what it means, or what it means in the context of everything else.

So... more or less, it's really hard to tell what is going on here, especially when you throw in your own names and terms that are really long and difficult to pronounce (and thus they can be hard to remember easily).

Granted, the esoteric element of all of this has its own appeal, but at the end of the day, I think most readers are looking for something a lot less challenging. That doesn't mean they're looking for something stupid, that just means they're looking for something they can understand and relate with on some level.

Also, a word of advise, if you're really serious about this project, and you must be to have done 230 or more pages for it, I recommend getting your own website for it.

All in all, great art, and this is really, really interesting, if near impossible to digest. I guess, I should say a reader probably could digest this if they REALLY, REALLY, REALLY tried, but I think it's asking too much of most readers. I think they may give up and move on.
Yes. All of the above. It's good looking and completely impenetrable work. It asks too much of the reader and gives almost nothing in return. You aren't telling the reader your story, instead you seem content to tell stories for yourself -- and you alone -- which is admirable. I think one has to be protective of art in progress to make the best results. But.

You may want to stop pretending you want a reader to understand these characters and events. Example: the title of the project isn't a name nor a word but letters that you intend a reader to sound out individually. So the title is X-T-I-N with short pauses between each letter? The title lacks meaning, being neither a word nor an acronym.

You've decided 'fuck my reader I don't care if he/she gets it' right from the start, on the cover, with the first info one needs to remember and understand in order to enter the story. Almost all dialogue is seemingly written from this perspective: like it stands for something we can't grasp because not enough info is given to know WHY the guy is saying the thing to the girl with sweat on his brow through gritted teeth. If readers can't figure out WHY a thing is happening because the WHAT is obscure, the prospective reading experience ends there.

If you're unwilling to regard this work as mutable WIP, why post here? This is a critique and job posting forum. People want help, work, both. You seem to want none even though you've gotten a lot of good suggestions, all of which deal with the omnipresent deficit of clarity in the pages you've posted.

Can we start with the newest page you posted? What's happening? The imagery seems scatalogical, each pnl separate and disconnected to the pnls around it. That's a big problem, even mismatched pnls create a juxtapositional continuity, these don't tell me a story I understand even provided the lettering. Help us understand?

Also yeah get a website.
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Old 06-22-2017, 11:20 PM   #57
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He was a carpenter, I was his assistant. When he got canned, the company owner didn't have any other work for me. The company took a big hit when the local media announced the carpenter was a child molester. All the homeowners the company owner had been doing work for freaked out because he'd had this "child molester" in their homes. I was told Lowe's stopped paying him for the work he was doing through them, which was most of his business. My neighbor worked without pay for several months before quitting. I've been hearing about the aftermath through the neighbor, so this is third or fourth hand information, but what I was told is that the evidence against the carpenter was so flimsy that the Judge laughed at it and threw it out it like it was nothing. The carpenter was in jail as an accused child molester for nearly a year on phoney charges it only took a judge a few moments to dismiss. Think about that. Nearly a year of his life stolen by some teacher or social worker who took a disliking to him.
Madness.
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Old 07-02-2017, 02:37 AM   #58
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Neil Allen View Post
I took a look at your project and it is very visually stimulating. You're a very inspired artist, and it's easy to see you generally have a big imagination. The concept of this series is interesting, however, I find that the delivery of... well... pretty much everything will make this series near inaccessible for most readers.
That's o.k., it isn't meant to be all ages.

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Even when the imagery is impressive, it can be difficult at times to tell what is happening, and even though the dialogue is cool, it can be hard to puzzle out what it means, or what it means in the context of everything else.
Have you read the first book? This isn't episodic. While I've tried to make it accessible to the new reader, it's a serialized story and the stuff that happened in the first book matters.

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So... more or less, it's really hard to tell what is going on here, especially when you throw in your own names and terms that are really long and difficult to pronounce (and thus they can be hard to remember easily).
I disagree on that one . Dune wouldn't be better without the Kwisatz Haderach or the Harkonnen, and even kids are able to learn names like "Pachirisu" and "Yajirobi" when they watch Pokemon or Dragonball.

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Granted, the esoteric element of all of this has its own appeal, but at the end of the day, I think most readers are looking for something a lot less challenging.
This is true, and I expect XTIN to remain a hard sell in comic form.

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Also, a word of advise, if you're really serious about this project, and you must be to have done 230 or more pages for it, I recommend getting your own website for it.
I've had one in the past. I'd rather let someone else fend off the hackers and the spammers.
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Old 07-02-2017, 03:20 AM   #59
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Yes. All of the above. It's good looking and completely impenetrable work. It asks too much of the reader and gives almost nothing in return.
I've had enough positive comments about the story from readers who got it and got something out of it.

If XTIN is too hard to be the next big thing, oh well, I'll just have to live with it. While I can appreciate the finer things in life, they aren't must-haves.

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The title lacks meaning, being neither a word nor an acronym.
I would have to say this is mistaken.

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If you're unwilling to regard this work as mutable WIP, why post here? This is a critique and job posting forum. People want help, work, both. You seem to want none even though you've gotten a lot of good suggestions, all of which deal with the omnipresent deficit of clarity in the pages you've posted.
Let's not get too hung up on the rules, but if that's what it's going to come to, the Writer's Showcase is here.

I haven't posted in the Writer's Showcase.
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Old 07-02-2017, 02:41 PM   #60
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That's o.k., it isn't meant to be all ages.
Not what he meant but ok. Then it should probably be clear to adults. We are not kids and we're struggling. Take this on its face.

Quote:
Have you read the first book? This isn't episodic. While I've tried to make it accessible to the new reader, it's a serialized story and the stuff that happened in the first book matters.
You just broke my brain dude. Episodic and serialized are essentially the same. You'll have two books continuing one story when this book is done? That's an episodic narrative. Two episodes. And releasing that big story in more than one part, whether in print or online, makes it a serialized publication.

Of course the first book matters but you shouldn't have to read 200 pages of it to get an idea of what's going on. That means communicating The Five W's (including How if possible).

Quote:
I disagree on that one . Dune wouldn't be better without the Kwisatz Haderach or the Harkonnen, and even kids are able to learn names like "Pachirisu" and "Yajirobi" when they watch Pokemon or Dragonball.
You're not Herbert and this isn't DUNE, but if that's what you're going for great! People love DUNE because it's immersive, clever and vast. Use those ideas -- not the complex names and places and made-up words -- as your inspiration. Deconstruct it.

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This is true, and I expect XTIN to remain a hard sell in comic form
It doesn't HAVE to be.

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I've had one in the past. I'd rather let someone else fend off the hackers and the spammers.
Whatever that means. If your comic website was being attacked by waves of hackers and spammers -- which I find hard to believe frankly -- you were doing something wrong with it. I know a lot of folks with websites, even a tumblr works in this regard.

If you want people to read this book and the previous one then put it in front of them.
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