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Old 04-10-2015, 03:10 PM   #2
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Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Oregon
Posts: 31
Beardywriterface is on a distinguished road

Hgjuuuck! Ouch, my all of the things!

Well, that was a little more brutal than I thought it would be. Thank you guys for your input. I was hoping you'd at least get to page 8... but I think that's exactly part of the problem you were talking about.

Okay! Regroup, reload, retry. You've given me a lot to think about.

And for what it's worth... I wanted to be a novelist in high school, and this issue was a sequence I ripped out of a story I'd written then when I got the idea for this one. Exhibit 1 of cramming square peg into round hole?

Thanks again guys. Back to work!
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